Hi there, I enjoy the books on here (although I never manage to complete them) I'm starting to write one of my own, bizarrely enough set in a school. The layout is probably closer to house of Hell than the other books (although there is no fear score).

Do you have any advice to give me on thins to do and things to avoid when writing??

There's some advice in this thread, and also at :

Mark J. Popp's old site
Stuart Lloyd's blog (early entries)

The various reviews of the Windhammer competition entries are entertaining, and you might pick up some pointers from them. However they are highly subjective and you have to keep in mind that they are generally written by rival competitors.

My own subjective advice (but note that while I've seen quite a few gamebooks now I haven't written any) :

- Assuming that you're using the FF system, consider fixing the initial values of SKILL/STAMINA/LUCK. This allows you to judge the difficulty more easily. It is rare to see an FF gamebook that is balanced for both SKILL 7 and SKILL 12.

- Take great care that all the 'turn to' numbers are correct. If too many are broken, readers will give up on it.

- The most important aspect is the story. Systems can be easily changed, mistakes can be fixed, but there's not much that can be done if it's not a good read. That being said, one of the standard pieces of advice given to writers in general is to write as much as possible, so even if you end up with a dull gamebook the chances are you will still have improved your writing.

Above all, have fun and good luck.

Ulysses
Thu Feb 12 08:22:58 2015

@Paul Mc

Good on you for starting the process.
My advice is to make sure you have a good story, not just a technical gamebook.

Good luck!

Paul Mc
Thu Feb 12 18:13:29 2015

I thank you for that advice, I'm particularly enjoying the narrative of writing this and I'm confident I'll write a good story.
The hard part is getting all the (turn to???) correct as my book is not linear, you can go in different ways so sometimes you can enter the same corridor from 2 or 3 different ways.

Im finding it particularly hard with trying to script it so that the reader only does something once. e.g. on one passage you fight a bully in a corridor, then depending on how you play you could end up in the same bit of corridor later in the story. You've already fought that bully so I can't use the same text.

It follows the conventional Skill, Stamina, Luck. I'm trying to make it so that while better stats gives you an advantage, it is possible even with low stats. There are opportunites to increase initial values too on occasions.
There is also another stat called Respect (this is how popular/cool you are percieved by others in the school). You start with a die roll +3 and can increase/decrease depending what you do. It can never go below 0 and never go above 11. It is often tested when you need somebody to help you or in certain other situations.
The last little thing I've thrown in is an anti bullying penalty. There is the option to fight alot of people in this. Some of the battles will be quite good. Skill 8 Stamina 8 is generally something I use. However there might be somebody in a room that you have the option to attack but they pose no threat. Normally their stats are very low (Girl: Skill 3 Stamina 4). If you attack somebody (unless your only choice is fight, or escape) who's Skill is 6 or less, then that is kinda bullying and you will lose a luck point for that. Also be careful who you upset, you may need them later on in the story.

Two standard techniques for dealing with revisiting locations are codewords and checkboxes. Isle Of The Cyclops contains examples of each. However, it's still legitimate to instead say something like, 'if you've been here before turn to X, otherwise read on'.

Robert Douglas
Thu Feb 12 18:26:45 2015

@ Paul Mc (and other fellow writers),

One way around the troublesome low attribute scores is to have the player start with a pre-determined character. Legend of Zagor provides a good example of how each character has advantages and disadvantages over the others. Ian Livingstone also took into account particular armour and qualities they could or could not use depending on their character's background. Wizard FF editions adopted this idea as the norm - they realized that very few gamebooks made it easy for Skill 7, Stamina 14, Luck 7 (one, two, or all three of these!).

I'd also advise any author to take time when devising a concept, before writing even starts. My personal preference is to go out for a long walk: I find both exercise and speculative thought stimulates the imagination when planning plots, situations, routes, characterization, etc. Normally these are fen roads seldom travelled by cars; the less distractions the better. I also have a sheet of paper handy to note down key points when planning more complex adventures.

If an author is stuck for story ideas, I'd recommend inspiration by listening to music. Even if a theme is unrelated to the subject matter, it can still spark that enthusiasm. I normally listen to music whilst writing. At times, I simply insert an item or character around which plot ideas spring up then materialize later on.

These points are subjective to my own personal experience and other authors may prefer different aids in writing.

I like that word: subjective.

Phil Sadler
Thu Feb 12 22:41:15 2015

Ian Livingstone didn't write that book. It was ghostwritten by Keith Martin.

Tammy
Thu Feb 12 23:21:50 2015

Get a large notepad about 300 pages to keep track of all your mapping and refs in there per gamebook. The more gamebooks you write the easier it'll all come to you. Do alot of reading and studying of how others write their gamebooks amateur and professional. I usually like to write little games about 30 to 60 paras for practice and they can be any genre.

and,

Im finding it particularly hard with trying to script it so that the reader only does something once. e.g. on one passage you fight a bully in a corridor, then depending on how you play you could end up in the same bit of corridor later in the story. You've already fought that bully so I can't use the same text.
Just ask us if we've been this way before and met the bully, if so, turn to this number.... If not, read on...

Paul Mc
Fri Feb 13 02:57:11 2015

I thank you all for the great advice. I am trying to make it 400 references long and I have done about 40 so far, I'm really enjoying writing this.
Based on my playing experience of what I like and don't like I have decided to not be too eager to give/take away stamina, nor have I made battles too hard especially early in the adventure. Nothing annoys me more than dying by my stamina falling to 0. I'd at least like to read a bad ending.
I'm enjoying writing some of the deaths/bad endings too, My game will be fairly hard and the chances are you will meet a few of these bad endings. So I have decided to make them as interesting for the reader as possible.

Ulysses
Fri Feb 13 08:36:35 2015

@Paul Mc

Just to get us interested, what is the main premise of the story?

Paul Mc
Fri Feb 13 16:03:50 2015

The actual full narrative of it needs work but in brief you are sent to a school and this is your 1st day. (How you end up there needs works). However this school is a cover up for a demonic cult which kills people, steals their souls and gives them to the devil. The back story still needs work. You start off in the caretakers office as a punishment for damaging property which you didn't even do (again, a set up for your doom). You are unaware of this doom still.
Your adventure is basically, get out of the school alive. There are many rooms, corridors, people, battles, traps, red herrings and things you have to do to escape.

Tammy
Fri Feb 13 21:34:10 2015

If you can get your hands on BOOK 2 of the 'Harrow' series called MISCHIEF by Douglas Clegg, it may also help with ideas.

In Mischief, the horror of Harrow is reborn — as Harrow Academy, a private school for boys. A dark fraternity exists within Harrow — and it wants new blood…

It has waited for years…

The large mansion overlooks the Hudson River, just outside the town of Watch Point, New York. And Jim Hook, should never have come to Harrow Academy…because he may be the new key to unlocking the terrors of the house.

“Douglas Clegg is the best horror writer of the post-Stephen King generation.”
— Bentley Little, author of The Policy

Richard Evans
Fri Feb 13 22:50:15 2015

My key tip for writing a gamebook would be simply to have a really watertight plan, without care your references can balloon well beyond your expectations - as I think they did a little for me in a Shadow in the North.

Paul Mc
Sat Feb 14 04:37:45 2015

I'll put the back story on here for those who were interested (I have done 65 passages so far and based on how much of the school I have done and how the story is looking there should be 350 or 400 passages)... This is just to see if anybody likes the concept...

You are a 15 year old boy, you have just moved from the city to a quaint rural town much to your disgust. You enjoyed the city, your school, your house and your friends, you were very settled but now you had to upsticks to the middle of nowhere to a place you know nothing about. You know nothing about this town other than the people here seem to live in the dark ages. The people of the city warned you however about sinister goings on and people just disappearing.
At least there is a school nearby and you might make some friends there. Today was your first day at school, there was no lessons, just an induction and a long assembly where a creepy eerie man told you about the Moon Festival (a big tradition in this unnerving town you are in). He also mentioned about a Moon Ball and sacrificing souls for this event, you blocked out most of what was said as you found it tiresome and rather disturbing. At the end of the assembly your name was called out and you were summoned to the front of the room...
“You” the eerie man exclaimed “are nothing but an abomination to this school, you have damaged property, you are an evil infidel trying to spoil the Festival of the Moon for everyone, you city people are of no purpose to our glorious town!!” The eerie man raises a chalice and the assembly chant “INFIDEL, INFIDEL.” The man raises his hands and the assembly fall into a cold silence. He says “you will be taken to isolation to think about what you have done!!!” You protest your innocence but a haggard looking man with swarthy skin takes you away and leads you to a room... he utters “sit here and do not move til I come back” he steps out of the room. You still wonder what the hell is going on!! Little do you know the horrors that are about to befall you and the evil that lies in the heart of this school...

Ulysses
Sat Feb 14 10:01:18 2015

@Paul Mc

The back story does have many interesting elements. But it doesn't really sound like a school. As you have described it, it could be set in the town in general.
What is the purpose of the school angle? If you just wanted a contained environment you could still set it in a school, but the main character doesn't have to be a student. There are any number of reasons the character could end up there.

Hope that's helpful.

Paul Mc
Sat Feb 14 15:42:02 2015

I thank you for that. I can always work on the background, however there is a couple of reasons why I have chosen a school.
1. It hasn't been done yet, or if it has I haven't seen it. House, City, Tomb, Graveyard, Weird lands and Sci-fi have all been done a few times so wanted to avoid that.
2. You are right, I did want a contained environment. What I have read in the past and my writing style means I find it much easier to set the story in some sort of building.

It should be finished in a couple of weeks, so hopefully people will enjoy it.

Robert Douglas
Sun Feb 15 17:52:12 2015

@ Paul Mc,

It's your gamebook, it's up to you to decide the player's character, background, environment, and many other aspects of the story.

I do have some advice: don't make the conspiracy too obvious and especially not right at the beginning. Yes, the adventure is based on House of Hell, but fans still like that gradual introduction to the evil. The player needs to be lulled into something dark and secret. He/she can always discover the truth of what's happening as the adventure progresses, through written sources such as diaries, by encountering/talking to other characters. At first, hint at something wrong, perhaps how odd the older students behave, the teachers, the parents, and mention of a traditional Moon Ball Festival - which turns out to be something far more evil. Have the player investigate further, maintain the suspense, then up the ante as they get in too deep.

It's easier to drop the player into an evil situation within a more isolated place (Blood of the Zombies, for example) or a world all-too familiar with demons and monsters (fantasy-realm gamebooks), yet a school is more difficult to maintain control over whilst it's existence is known to the ordinary outside world (parents, board of governors, the authorities, etc); there are consequences so all conspiracies have to be done in secret, from the shadows. It's possible such high-ranking figures can be converted, or brainwashed, yet not most. If the town is a backward place full of strange people, and the player's former city knows of this evil reputation, then how does it get away with it without the law becoming involved? I'd advise dispensing with 'people disappearing', although you could mention something like freak 'accidents' to create sinister suspense. Who was killed? How? What causes the player's suspicion - is there a connection between the victims? Something the local law has missed?

Also, as to your environment, you don't have to limit yourself to the floor-plan ABOVE ground. Use your imagination and look through the eyes of the conspirators, how they would react, conduct their affairs and plans to ensure secrecy. What is the school standing on? What existed before it was built? Who proposed plans to build it?

I would recommend doing something I failed to do in many of my gamebooks: limit the attribute test rolls, give the player more choice of action. Also, try to give some clue (obscure or otherwise) which way the player should go (via character advice, written notes, diaries, etc). It just gives the perceptive player that bit more of chance, also a sense of achievement.

These are just hints and ideas for the story. Hope you find them useful. Look forward to seeing it!

Paul Mc
Mon Feb 16 13:40:21 2015

I will consider that.
I have actually gone with the idea of things get revealed bit by bit, via displays on the wall giving clues and interaction with other characters. Also some of the bad endings/deaths reveal alot too so it is worth taking a few different routes.
There is a particular character who features alot in the game which is a key part of the story and you completing the game.
Other characters feature in the game and can give you information however whether they do or not often depends on whether you are popular or not (hence the respect attribute).
I'll admit I have gone a little test roll happy but when I have finished it, I am going to play it with Skill 9, Stamina 18, Luck 9 and Respect 6 as they are all in the middle Im hoping it is difficult but not very difficult as I dont want it to be impossible with the lowest stats or easy with the highest stats.

Paul Mc
Mon Feb 16 14:06:07 2015

Also to clear something up. This adventure has nothing at all to do with House of Hell, it is not a spinoff nor is it based on House of Hell, I may have mislead you accidentally.
The writing style and format however has been influenced by that book. i.e. The aim is to escape, the things you have to do to escape and a couple of the bad endings.

Robert Douglas
Tue Feb 17 00:16:24 2015

@ Paul Mc,

Sorry I made the mistake about association with House of Hell. Hope my advice gives you a few pointers; it might help buoy up the plot and story, adding some interesting aspects to gameplay.

One other point I'd like to make is that each author has a different approach and style to their writing. Some gamebooks are simplistic, others are more complex. As to the volume of test rolls, it's hard to keep disciplined and rein them in. I think gamebook authors fall into the trap of every obstacle having to be resolved via test roll. Some can be solved by use of items or information learned but such instances are few and far between - unless you're playing an Ian Livingstone title and have to collect twenty or so essential items! If you lack even one of these: DEATH! Both aspects are part of the gameplay yet it's all to easy to lose track of how many test rolls/essential items you work into the adventure.

There's also some diversity of personal taste on gamebook concepts, styles, and gameplay as regards those reading the adventure: bear in mind some people will like or dislike certain aspects of your approach. A few will offer constructive criticism; improvements worthy to note when writing future gamebooks.

We all look forward to seeing your gamebook once it's complete! I'm still working on something for the next Windhammer - meanwhile Sean Calibre Book 2 is put on hold.

Paul Mc
Thu Feb 19 20:28:39 2015

All the advice given has been a great help.
I've tried to make it about the back story and I have used other characters revealing bits of information as one of the key things, as well as displays.
I've tried to make it so the characters/displays not only give the reader helpful clues of how to complete the game, but pieces of the back story and the sinister goings on.

I have also decided to balance test rolls so there is a few but not too many, I have also decided to balance essential items so while you will need a couple you again do not need to many. The test rolls should more often than not lead to manageable penalties rather than instant deaths. Should a test roll lead to a death, then you could have probably avoided the test roll.

I am about half way through writing it and I'm enjoying the plot I am creating, and some of the deaths too. Thank you to all for your advice, I should have this completed in a couple of weeks.

Paul Mc
Tue Feb 24 00:13:02 2015

Right I am two thirds of the way through this book, I should have it done this week, or at the latest next week.
I only have 4 key rooms to do and the final bit.

What is the email address to email the gamebook over to??

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