Having a good time! I still prefer house of pain so far but it’s very fun.

Typos:
Ref #: 74
... you steal yourself

# 293:
... to a ancient

# 250: ... although you’re that the...

# 100: ... closely the door...

# 3: ... just continue to stand at the all

You sometimes spell glow stones and sometimes glowstones.

Deaths:
#1: death by skull tentacle
#2: death by devil horse
#3: death by dwarf trial fight
#4: death by shade

Player 1 to 3 on novice, now playing on medium.

I have some things that put me off a bit, let me know if you’re interested. It’s nit picking just so you know.

Arron
Tue Jan 7 23:10:53 2020
House Of Horror
Skull - non-optimum ending reached

Well, i should have learned from the Original House of hell. Dont drink white wine lmfao

Etienne
Tue Jan 7 00:48:27 2020
Hunger Of The Wolf

Really good book. I thoroughly enjoyed it. I often wonder if an actual barbarian would refer to himself as a 'barbarian' though.

This was one the good ones to be honest. It never got frustrating, the difficulty felt just right.

Etienne
Tue Jan 7 00:34:28 2020
Gamebooks

Don't know about that. I've read criticism before on other books here about being too wordy and I often agree.

Anyhow, has anyone ever tried starting from the "end" and going backwards? Did you think it worked out in the end? I'm trying to find the best way to do this. I'm about 20 refs in by now.

Phil Sadler
Mon Jan 6 12:06:36 2020
Gamebooks

A ref should be as long as you like; as long as you feel it should be.

Etienne
Mon Jan 6 11:23:48 2020
Gamebooks

Great! This is exactly what I wanted to know.

Also, how long do you think a ref should be to avoid being wordy?

Phil Sadler
Sun Jan 5 18:23:50 2020
Gamebooks

Well I tend to go like this:

1.) General idea for a story, but it may be best to do your own sequel to one of the real FF books you love if it's your first attempt.

2.) Get a map together and fill it with essential, useful or red-herring items.

3.) Have some of those items guarded by favourite monsters, tricks, riddles or other types of traps, but try to fool the reader into not knowing which items are which straight away.

4.) Have some fights interspaced between the essential items, as well as other interesting situations such as mass-battles, wild-goose chases and bluffs/double-bluffs.

5.) Have a sprinkling of instant deaths here and there.

6.) Play test it (I always try to balance for 'average' characters, apart from in my first book where I was too inexperienced).

7.) Edit it.

8.) Release it.

Now for some general advice:

(a) Always try to balance so that an average (skill 9) character can get through, that way, if he can, then those characters near him in abilities (Skill 8, 10 and 11) should be able to as well. Don't worry about the extreme ends of the skill spectrum.

(b) Do the same for luck and stamina.

(c) Try not to have enemies of more than 9 skill unless they are weak, avoidable or have other ways to weaken them or power yourself up.

(d) Try to avoid to many tests for luck/skill/stamina, especially ones that result in death, absolutely especially on the 'main path'.

(e) Try not to have a complete shopping list of items, especially essential ones. It's just book-keeping for the player.

(f) Almost always end each paragraph with at least one choice.

(g) Not too many 'dead' rooms with nothing or very little in them because you'll go there once and then never again.

(h) Give the player a few clues here and there but sprinkle in a few false ones too.

(i) For monster encounters you should make them interesting in one of two ways: either the monster itself (triple-headed dragon for instance) or the combat instead (he can take your skill or luck or become more powerful or steal your things or break your sword or weaken you, or whatever).

Etienne
Sun Jan 5 14:12:01 2020
Gamebooks

Hello!

I've been trying to read how the various authors write their gamebooks in the feedback sections but I'm pretty sure I missed some.

To authors:
How do you proceed when writing a gamebook? Try to be as detailed as possible in your writing process please: optimal method, software used, use of maps, inventory size, number of instant deaths...

also: what you consider to be the fundamentals of a good gamebook and things to avoid.

Thank you!

Robert Douglas
Sat Jan 4 16:35:06 2020
The Curse Of Drumer

Okay, thanks for the response and feedback :)

Etienne
Sat Jan 4 16:06:22 2020
Shrine Of The Salamander

I liked this adventure. I just wish it was longer.

SPOILER
At the end, it would’ve been awesome to have to do the journey back to safety. It would’ve lengthened the story and make for a more satisfying ending. I hope you’ll expend on this story as opposed to write a new one. The spells mechanic sure was a lot of fun.

Etienne
Sat Jan 4 16:01:44 2020
The Curse Of Drumer

Well it’s a matter of personal preferences. I think I had some expectations of something similar to House of Hell since it’s related. House of Hell had very little humor (if any) and focused on setting up a grim atmosphere.

I think I would’ve reacted differently if your book wasn’t somehow linked to HoH. I think an Indiana Jonesesque dialogue works nicely in an action/adventure context but in this case I believe this kind of character interaction does a disservice to anything horror-related.

Again, it depends what you’re going for. I can’t feel any immersion if the main character reacts in an unrealistic fashion. I think it’s perhaps why the communication of protagonists in ff games is often passive as opposed to actual text quotes because it facilitates immersion.

We all have ideas as to what gamebooks *should* be. I personally could never get into « Wrong Way Go Back » because of the comedic overtone. It’s not for me but I’m not saying it’s bad, it’s not what I’m looking for.

I think predictability is also a big element of immersion. Giving choices which are things someone in a certain situation would likely do. If the reaction is unthinkable or counter-intuitive, immersion is gone.

As for the amount of choices, I think that’s a key element when it comes to game books. A lot of realistic choices which provide a lot of different outcomes. As a player, I expect to take part in the story as opposed to passively being told what happens as this the nature of a book or novella.

I think if someone is very attached to the telling of a very specific story, it’s sometimes better to opt not to use the gamebook format. It allows the development of characters as the writer intends to as opposed to being based on the player’s decision.

I think a lack of agency hinders immersion, involvement and ultimately fun. In your gamebook, I could hardly continue when the protagonist would use quips while being pursued by crazed cultists. No one would ever react like that. I think running away in fear would be what most people would do, saving their breath to save their lives as opposed to saying: « I’ll take my chances! »

I’m writing all of this as feedback for your next creation. Feel free to dismiss my message, it’s just my opinion after all.

Robert Douglas
Fri Jan 3 17:32:28 2020
Reading Club

My eleventh read for this year's bookwormathon is another SAS: Who Dares Wins presenter biography. 'Break Point' tells the story of how Ollie Ollerton shrugged off his actions of being a young offender and endeavoured to realize an ambition of joining the army. Although this seemed like a complete turnaround, however, only in recent years has he finally settled into a way of life that satisfies his personal goals - one of which is to help others in their struggle with physical and mental barriers. But his positive outlook and gratitude for 'silver linings' (as he often quotes!), an ever restless non-conformist with unbounded energy, has pushed him from one type of job to another, from one situation to another. But one lesson here is that Special Forces soldiers, while highly trained and truly exceptional in their skills, are also as human as the person in civvy street, subject to emotional turmoil, boredom and self-doubts, prone to making mistakes just like the rest of us. Ollie's witty, breath-taking, and at times humbling biography is an excellent example from which to draw inspiration. It's never a sin to learn from the mistakes of others, nor is it ever wrong to applaud their achievements - a sentiment to which I'm certain Ollie would agree. A book very hard to put down....in both the physical and metaphorical sense!

Robert Douglas
Fri Jan 3 17:28:58 2020
Reading Club

My tenth read for 2019 - and ashamedly my first taste of Simon Scarrow's superb style - is entitled 'Invictus'. It follows protagonists Macro and Cato as they are given command of a Praetorian Cohort with one vital mission: to help crush a massive rebellion in Hispania led by renegade Iskerbeles. But, as nearly always, the best laid plans are not so straightforward and seldom go accordingly. Continuously defying the odds, Macro and Cato endeavour to thwart both rebel and imperial ambition, while victory is by no means certain.... This is a breath-taking adventure with such page-turning descriptive of bloody battles in the same vein as Bernard Cornwell's stories. The various characters are themselves very intriguing and memorable, each with a background and their own integral part to play. Along the way, Simon Scarrow also gives an insight into how the Roman Army often behaved, performed and functioned - a true historical novel of epic proportions

Robert Douglas
Fri Jan 3 17:04:48 2020
The Curse Of Drumer

Hi Etienne,
Sorry you didn't like the style of dialogue. Being an Indiana Jones fan (right from very beginning when Raiders was released in 1981) I'll take that as a compliment. Bear in mind that the gamebooks on this list automatically take into account what items/notes the player came across; as you pointed out there might be half a dozen references to read through before presenting you with a proper (click) choice of action/direction/test roll. TCOD's admittedly more linear design doesn't exactly follow a multi-branch map that you might find in, say, 'Scorpion Swamp' or the recent 'Gates of Death'. If you prefer the typical, old-school style of a gamebook, there is always the Downloads Section as an option. However, good news is that the gamebook I'm currently working on might more suit your tastes as regards dialled down dialogue, a simpler narrative, and a greater number of choices :)

rogel
Wed Jan 1 14:18:14 2020
A Saint Beckons

I always killed after getting to know the brothers of the girl that I saved. there was no fight. I was just killed why is that?

Phil Sadler
Wed Jan 1 14:05:39 2020
House Of Pain

I love video games and I'm currently playing the latest Tomb Raider. I actually did try to get into game design a couple of decades ago, I didn't try very hard mind you and so I got discouraged because they all seemed to want programmers and not designers. I guess that's why I got into writing these gamebooks instead.

I have no updated version of HOP but I can certainly say that I did edit it as best I could, but it's actually a very long and boring process and so I can understand that I missed a few things.

Don't forget to give 'Deathtrap' a try, if you haven't already...

Etienne
Wed Jan 1 13:52:42 2020
House Of Pain

I wrote you to the email mentioned in your pdf but I got an error, saying the email wasn't valid. This is what I wrote:

Have you ever considered designing video games? I like your ideas. (Loved the plague demon made of rats)!

The pdf had a few typos and I think an instance or two of formatting issues. I should've written them down on the plane but I was honestly burned out and was too lazy. If I recall correctly, it was often repeated prepositions.

If you have fixed the original version, could you update the link of ffproject?

Also, it would be nice to have an idea as to what the special items *could* be used for. I never use them as I have no clue what they could remotely be used for. It's say that's the only "shortcoming" for lack of a better word. Even a very, vary vague sentence would really help.

I wish I could offer to adapt 'House of Pain' as an interactive video game. While I have the artistic background to do so, I lack any programming knowledge.

This book of yours deserves to be experienced by more people, seriously.

Would really be happy to hear from you!

Phil Sadler
Wed Jan 1 06:57:42 2020
House Of Pain

Wow! Thanks so much for your comments!

Etienne
Wed Jan 1 03:09:18 2020
The Curse Of Drumer

I couldn't go through with it. I couldn't get into the dialogue which felt unrealistic to me considering the circumstances. It felt like a script for an Indiana Jones movie with the casual banter going on after someone's dad just died.

Too many references without choices as well. Reading from a reference to another reference without having any choices at all was disappointing to me. It felt linear at times and sort of like reading a book as opposed to being a participant in the story.

Still congratulations on writing the whole thing. Just not my cup of tea, not saying it's a not a good book.

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